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Love, Change And The Reason For Your Existence

It’s time to switch gears slightly and return to my series on creating positive change in your life.

If you’re looking for pure money making tips, you might want to skip this article, although if you do you will miss out on one of the most powerful articles I’ve written about becoming wealthy, so you really should read on…

If you’ve not read the earlier parts in this series, I strongly recommend you do so first by reading these articles in the following order:

  1. Is It Really Possible To Create The Change You Want In Your Life?
  2. What I Can Teach You About Getting What You Want
  3. Why Creating The Change You Want Is All About You
  4. Don’t Let Ignorance Stop You
  5. How I Realized My Sense Of Self and Why It Changed My Life Forever
  6. Is There A Force Behind Everything In Life?
  7. What Is The Nature Of Truth

The purpose of this series is to help you proactively create the changes you desire most in your life.

The first few articles in this series laid out a roadmap of practical ideas, mindset shifts and activities you can do to create the change you want.

The latter articles delved into the spiritual component of change, which can be of tremendous support when your belief in the possibility for real change in your life is wavering. For some people considering what lies behind the physical, what you might call the spirit, is equally important when working towards change.

Open Your Mind

One of the very important takeaways I must reiterate to you now because it’s very relevant for this chapter, is the idea that you review resources based on the information provided and how it reflects on the truth you want to create, and NOT judge it based on the delivery mechanism.

In other words, judge the message, not the messenger.

When it comes to spirituality, we spend so much time assessing the messenger, that it often clouds our ability to take on board the ideas. This occurs outside a spiritual context too, as we pay way more attention to people over ideas, unfortunately even when the ideas are sound and the people are flawed, although sometimes the flaw is what allows us to see the good idea.

Every day life is littered with experiences and opportunities to learn from others, whether in a book we read, or a movie we watch, or even just a conversation with a friend. In these instances we spend the majority of our time discussing the history, appearance, or performance of the people who delivered the idea to us, and how they made us feel, which is the “gatekeeper” for how we absorb, if at all, what ideas they teach. We spend the majority of our time talking gossip about the messenger, and much less time about what we can learn from the messages.

One major shift you can make right now is always look for the practical lesson or mindset shift you can take away from any given resource you come across. This is especially helpful when people around you make mistakes. You don’t have to make the mistake to learn from it, other people make enough already every day that you have countless sources to draw upon for “inspiration”.

Just remember, don’t focus on the sensationalism or scandal that the mistake comes packaged with. Leverage the opportunity for growth by becoming aware of the opposite behavior or choice that would lead to the desired outcome, rather than the not desired outcome.

Conversations With God

I made the mistake of prejudging a resource that I’m about to introduce because it had the word “God” in the title.

God, as I talked about earlier in this series, as a label has an incredible amount of baggage that comes with it. So much so that I was often repulsed from any materials that included some kind of God component because I feared the agenda behind the message.

Was someone trying to “convert me” to something?

Is a belief in a “God” required in order to benefit from the resource in the first place?

Similar questions like this resulted in my default decision to avoid God based materials in the past, including one that I am going to talk about now, which has had the most profound impact on my belief structure of any resource I have ever come across before.

The book, or in this case, series of books is called “Conversations With God” written by Neale Donald Walsch.

Before you stop reading because you know this book already, or you don’t like the direction I’m heading in here with this article, let me assure you that I’m about to relate some of the most powerful lessons I’ve ever learned when it comes to creating positive change – and it doesn’t require a belief in God at all.

Still here? Good.

I can’t remember when I first heard of Conversations With God, but I had seen the title floating around for years and lumped it into the too “religious” or too “new age” category for a long time. As I grew older, my eyes were opening thanks to life experience and studying other spiritual literature, so for whatever reason, it eventually came time to have a conversation with God.

The first contact I had with the book, ended up being the movie of the same name, which is part chronicle of sections of the life of the author Neale, and part content from the book. In typical fashion I was looking for a more efficient than reading method to take on board ideas, so sat down and watched the movie.

The movie is good, if perhaps a bit brief in terms of the content it reveals from the book. However it was enough for me to get interested in the book, so I went out and purchased the first book in spoken audio format.

If there was ever a book designed for an audio version, Conversations With God is it. The book is a dialogue between “God” and the author Neale, and the audio version features Neale voicing his parts, and male and female voice actors voicing God (the male having a particularly “god-like” voice, which really enhances the experience – it really feels like God is talking to you!).

You can find out more about the book in audio and text format at Amazon.com. You should start with Book 1 if you have never read this series before.

WTF! Is It Really God Speaking?

The first question that inevitably jumps to mind when you learn about this book is what’s going on with this talking to God business? Is it really God? Is the author insane?

The answer to pretty much every question like this is “yes” and “both”. Yes it is God speaking, but the author is also making it all up in his head. Yes you might call him crazy for listening to a voice, but that voice has some profound things to say, so it would be crazy not to listen.

Here’s my synopsis to clarify –

Neale is middle aged and going through a particularly low point in his life. He spends a full year on the streets homeless, finally gets a job, rents a place to live, then the job suddenly disappears and he finds himself heading right back to where he was.

He’s so upset by the rollercoaster that is his life, in absolute frustration he takes out his journal and rants. His rant begins with a direct question to God –

“What’s the point of all this?”

Then, mysteriously, a voice takes control of his pen in his hand and he writes a response…

“Do you really want to know or are you just venting”

Neale replies that he is venting, but also wants to know, and thus begins a “conversation” between God and Neale, or Neale and the voice in his head, about the nature of, well, pretty much everything.

I’ve noticed, based on discussions with people who have been exposed to this book, that reactions are very mixed. Some people identify strongly with Neale rather than God and see the book as a way for him to deal with his issues. Others look at the voice of God as actually being a spiritual force, perhaps God itself, or just Neale tapping into his “higher self”.

I’ve had people tell me they couldn’t finish the book because it challenged them to the point of having panic attacks. Others find it contradicts their religious upbringing or existing belief structure so much that they can’t identify with it on much more than a mildly interested level.

I can’t possibly account for the range of reactions to this book people have, or what you might have had already. As always I’m not here to try and convince you of anything, but I can say that this book has been incredibly enlightening for me. If you asked me why, I would say that it simply feels right to me on many levels, often makes logical sense as well, and, at the end of the day, has made my life better. It has brought about many profound shifts in my thinking and awareness changes that have impacted my life in a positive way.

It’s my intention now to share with you some of the most powerful ideas I took away from studying the Conversations With God series, as they relate to creating positive change in your life, building upon what we have worked on to this point so far in the positive change series.

Bear in mind this is just a tiny sampling of the overall concepts covered in the Conversations With God series, so I do recommend you check them out if what I write here resonates with you. If you think me “believing” in this book is foolish, that’s fine. You can ignore this resource and look and what I’m about to share with you as stand alone ideas without the baggage of them coming from someone who thinks he talks to God (that’s probably a good idea anyway!).

The Practical Benefits Of Spirituality

Before I introduce you to these ideas, I’d like to point out that you don’t have to believe in a “God” in order to benefit from this. These are powerful concepts that, I believe, represent fundamental structures of the universe and because of this, they work. They work on such a profound level, that if you truly adopt what I’m about to share with you, you can literally turn your life around in any direction you want.

Excited? Here we go…

Love Or Fear Are Base Responses To Everything – And You Choose Which One You Experience

I’ll start with the simplest concept to grasp, but the most powerful. Every human on earth, on a fundamental level, understands and experiences this every day with every decision and thought made.

If you drill down to the core motivation behind every response you have to everything in life, whether it’s a thought in response to a physical stimulation, words delivered to you from someone else, or your choice to take an action or not, it comes down to two motivations, one of either…

1. Fear

Or

2. Love

These two words are the best we have in the English language to describe polar opposites of the emotional spectrum that governs our lives.

Emotions we might call “negative”, things like jealousy, envy, rage, bitterness, sadness and hatred stem from the core feeling of fear. It might be a fear of loss, a belief that scarcity means you will be denied something, a fear that you are not good enough, or unlucky, or someone else will cause you to suffer or that the world at large is out to get you, or humanity as a whole is bad.

On the other side of the coin, love represents what we commonly label “positive”. Things like happiness, abundance, joy, friendship, goodness, care, selflessness and beliefs that you are okay, that there is always enough and people in general are good.

What I find particularly interesting about this concept is the benefit when you apply it practically to your decision making process and also your emotional conditioning in real life.

If you look at the interconnection between your thought processes, your emotional responses and your resulting real world output (things you say or do as a result of your thoughts and emotions), you can truly look at everything as either black or white, good or bad, or through the eyes of love or fear.

This might seem contradictory at first, since life is not black and white and what is good can be bad depending on interpretation.

We’ve already explored the nature of truth, which ultimately is in the eye of the beholder (you “make up” your truth, giving whatever meaning you want to whatever you focus on), yet if you remove all the baggage and conditioning and story behind interpretation, at the core it really is that simple. It is either A or B, fear or love, based on your truth in that moment, and you can’t lie to yourself.

For example, when talking with friends I experience a range of emotions. As most humans do, whatever other people tell me about their lives I am naturally inclined to reflect on my own life and compare results.

If someone tells me they had this amazing experience, like they had tremendous success with a business project, or a beautiful member of the opposite sex asked them out, or they won a competition based on their talent, my response might be one of jealousy, or envy, or bitterness or even hatred for the other person or myself. I might be reminded of my continued inability to experience what they are experiencing, despite how hard I feel I have worked towards it. I will feel sad, depressed and frustrated, all because someone else has experienced what I want.

On the flip side, I can be happy for them, I can be excited that I too might have this experience if I work towards it, I can use it as motivation, fuel to stoke my fire and motivate me towards action. I can even go so far as congratulate them, make them feel great as a result (rather than complain about my own lack of success) and then (here’s the super-technique) ask them how I might go about replicating what they did.

As humans we all have a barometer within us that we can tap into anytime to ask ourselves whether we are acting in love or fear. Our feelings, those sensations that arise from the solar plexus area of the body, although infinitely complex in variety, can be drilled down into just two feelings – love or fear.

I found myself taking on board this practice into my every day life, by asking myself throughout the day whether I felt I was responding with love or fear, and what feeling I’d prefer to experience as a result of my thoughts and actions.

This probably doesn’t need to be said, but in general I prefer a sense of peace and feelings of joy and happiness – the love based emotions. I honestly believe all humans on a fundamental level agree with me and we all prefer love over fear, however the emotions are equally powerful. Because truth is always open to interpretation, and there are infinite complexities governing how we respond to things, a fear-base response is just as common, if not more common in our society, than a love response.

One of the other powerful realizations I’ve come to as a result of this practice, is that love based responses often focus on OTHER people and improving their lives. Helping others results in an improvement to your life immediately as you experience a positive emotional response in that moment. This can carry on into other areas of your life, as positive emotions tend to breed more positive emotions, thoughts and experiences. Thus the key to improving your life, is actually improving others lives, but this is not intuitively the case, especially in an ego driven society.

This insight takes plenty of repeat practice to make the change part of your life. As my default response prior to gaining this awareness, I had focused on my suffering as a result of not having what others have, and a contraction of my world – I want to hoard what I do have for fear of losing it.

If you focus on abundance and love for others, the result is the same for you, but intuitively you may not grasp this. This realization has actually been one of the most fundamental shifts in my thinking I’ve ever gone through and resulted in more positive change in my life than anything else I have done. As you will see in a moment when I cover the next point, it is critical you come to terms with this shift in thinking.

Next time you are talking to your friends, or listening to any person talking, whether in person or through media, or even while reading text like this you are reading now – stop and ask yourself how it makes you feel?

Do you feel a base emotion of fear or love? Do you feel sad because you don’t have something or do you feel happy because you are inspired to become a better person, go after something and change in a positive direction?

Are you judging the message and seeing how to positively apply it to your life, or judging the messenger looking for someone else to make the decision for you?

You have to take responsibility for what you think is right and then practice thinking and acting congruently with that belief. Remember there are only two ways, at the core, to interpret everything, and one way will improve your life dramatically, and the other will result in more of what you don’t want to experience. Make the smart choice using your emotional barometer to guide you and your logical brain to ask the question in the first place, because you can’t see the answer without first asking the question –

What would love do?

The True Process Of Change – Adding The Missing Manifestation Ingredient

One of the big problems I had when I first looked at the idea of there being some kind of force that reacts to how we think, the law of attraction or the creation field or whatever you want to call it, is how important it is to genuinely feel – to resonate or vibrate with – what you want to experience.

Let’s assume we believe that the universe has a set of rules behind how we create reality. These rules state that –

  1. What we think and focus on,
  2. We thus attract…
  3. Then experience in reality.

…and we are doing it all the time even when not consciously focused on it.

As I’ve talked about in previous chapters, you can look at this like a scientist and view it as simply a process of becoming aware of what you want, looking for ways to go after it and then taking actions to make it reality. This ignores any notions of the magical “universe” helping out, if you lean towards more pragmatic, physical reality only, belief structures.

My belief is that there is a fundamental set of rules regarding change based on the principles of thought, emotion and action, and how the physical world reacts to these elements. You can’t ignore them if you want to create real positive change in your life.

Whether you study The Secret, Abraham-Hicks, Eckhart Tolle, or Think and Grow Rich, The Master Key, or countless other spiritual, new age, personal development, or even very pragmatic business or psychology texts – everyone repeatedly emphasizes the interconnection between how you think, feel and act.

Without clarity and congruency between these three agents for creating what you want, you can’t master the wonderful creation tool that the universe is, at least not in a manner where you feel consciously in control.

Feelings, Change And The Impact Of Time

One of the key components of this process is genuinely feeling what you want to experience. Your emotional state is linked to how you vibrate and what you send out to the world. What you send out the to the world is what you get back. The mind is strong, but for most people physical reality is stronger.

It doesn’t matter if you keep telling yourself you are rich, that’s not going to convince you to feel that way if you don’t genuinely experience what you consider wealth. It doesn’t matter if you keep telling yourself you are attractive, if you continue to interpret how other people treat you as an indication that you are unattractive, and thus you don’t feel attractive.

This part of the change process had me completely stumped. I tried convincing myself that I was heading towards what I wanted, I attempted to use positive affirmations so I was “thinking the right things”. I studied how to get what I wanted and even went out into the real world to attempt actions that should take me closer to what I want.

All of these things helped, and they are important steps on the ladder towards change, but for the life of me I couldn’t shake the sadness or frustration or depression linked to my inability to attract or create or manifest or just achieve what I wanted. When I didn’t experience my desire, no matter what I did, my feelings couldn’t align with what it felt like to “win”.

This of course makes complete logical sense. How can you convince yourself to feel something that you have never experienced?

This also, frustratingly, follows right along with the supposed structure of the universe. If I didn’t feel like a winner I would never win. If I didn’t align my emotional state towards my desired outcomes, then the universe wouldn’t give me what I wanted. If my vibration was off, then reality would reflect that vibration, giving me more of what I didn’t want.

The whole process felt like one big, annoying, catch-22.

The problem, as I eventually realized, was that I focused 100% on me and what I wanted. I believed I didn’t have what I wanted, so could never feel it.

Conversations With God also talked about the same law; the universe has a creation system that is deliberately set up so you can manifest what you want. God said this, and eventually, God solved my catch-22 situation as well, leading to another major breakthrough in my awareness.

(The fact that I’m using the word “God” in this manner is still strange to me. I don’t see this “God” as anything religious, it’s just a source of ideas, and as I said at the start of this article, I focus on ideas, not the messenger. I admit, it’s much more fun, vindicating and powerful to believe this comes from somewhere spiritual, and thus I choose to believe it does, but the ideas stand alone without the context of where they come from, in my opinion. You don’t have to believe in God in order to benefit from these concepts. Don’t let ignorance stop you.)

The explanation for much of the frustration we experience with manifesting change is because we view our existence through the eyes of time. Our experience is sequential, one thing appears to happen after the other. Our conscious perception of reality makes change, especially the changes we really want, happen really, really slowly (for something to be “slow” you have to perceive time). As a result, change rarely happens when you want it to.

What is interesting though, if you take out the concept of time, or even just reflect over longer periods of time – like years or even decades – you can see that almost always, what you want to experience eventually occurs.

One thing is certain, change always happens, although it may not be exactly how you expected it (specificity in the creation process is not usually our strong point). In other words, without time, the creation process always happens exactly how you want it to happen and it happens instantly, because there is only the now. However with our perception of time, it doesn’t feel like it during the short periods, like minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and even sometimes as long as years, for the really big changes, because it feels so slow and we are constantly updating the changes we want as we go along.

This understanding doesn’t always make you feel better given the present situation that you choose to focus on, but it’s important to recognize the revelation. It is our perception of time that causes the frustration and we all know it’s the experience over time working towards a change that ultimately leads to the real change – the change in awareness about what you really want and what your truth is. Time is the most frustrating factor, but also, eventually, the most satisfying and fulfilling, because it gives you the opportunity to clearly define what you really want, what is true for you and the meaning of your existence.

How To Feel What You Don’t Think You Have

God, in the book, offered a wonderfully simple explanation for how we can “feel” like we have what we want. As all good insights are the simple ones, this proved to be a tremendous moment of enlightenment for me, and I hope this is for you too. Here we go…

If you don’t have what you want, and you need to feel like you do in order to attract what you want and vibrate in sync with the reality you want to experience (the truth you are creating), all you need to do is give it to others.

Yep, it is that easy, and it’s a truly beautiful thing.

If you want to experience wealth, give the experience of wealth to others. If you want to experience the emotion of beauty, give someone else the experience of feeling beautiful.

This ties wonderfully well into the previous insight about two base responses to all situations, love or fear. Remember how I said love based responses are about about helping others? Well the amazing thing is that your emotions don’t know the difference when it comes to you gaining something in your physical reality or someone else experiencing it as a result of your actions.

When you give you actually experience the emotional state that resonates with that experience. You experience love in that moment in a form far greater than you could ever experience it if you focused only on your gain. Do this often enough and you can’t help resonate with what you want. You become it before your physical reality reflects it.

You could be asking how can you give what you don’t have? The answer again is simple.

Emotions are not quantifiable, so there is no “amount” or quota required in order for you to experience something. You feel it or you don’t, and the universe (and your body) doesn’t tie that feeling in with a certain amount of something in the real world. A person who has food on the table and a roof above their head can feel just as much wealth, on an emotional level, as the richest person on this planet.

Right now, you can give wealth to someone else who might just need a few dollars for a meal. You can give someone the feeling of being beautiful simply by complimenting them in a genuine way. You can create a state of happiness within you by making someone else happy.

Giving to others is the path to experiencing the emotion in you, and in a world of abundance (you can manufacture limitless emotion), you can create these states every day, simply by focusing on others well being at all times.

When you see another person benefit from what you provide, you will experience the emotion of love, or at least a derivative of it, like joy, or wealth, or happiness, or beauty or clarity, or purpose – you will realize you actually created it in that experience, which even though physically benefited someone else, you emotionally experienced it.

This creates the necessary alignment – the feeling – in order to work the universal creation system. That feeling, combined with your thoughts and actions towards what you want, will bring it to you because you will no longer fight against your desires from a vibration/resonance stance by selfishly focusing only on your gain (or lack of gain).

The limiting belief that stops us from doing this every day is that we focus so much on ourselves and what we don’t have. If only we realized that giving is the key to having and lived every moment this way, we’d all be fighting each other to give everything to others. I literally believe we could solve all the world’s problems with just this one shift in awareness.

Why I Am Successful Online

If you sat me down and asked me why I’m a successful blogger I could give you all kinds of practical explanations and techniques that no doubt would be helpful. However at the heart of it there is only one reason why I succeed at what I do:

I thrive knowing that what I create impacts people in a positive way.

This is what motivates me. This is what motivates every person who does anything to contribute to the world.

There is nothing – and I mean nothing – more satisfying than hearing that what I wrote or said or did resulted in an awareness in someone else that lead to a positive impact on their lives. That, at the heart of it, is why I do what I do.

Yes money is wonderful, but people who make money know that as a substance alone it is meaningless. Meaning is derived from how it helps people and the reason why we want to help people is because it makes us feel good, it gives us purpose and a meaning for OUR existence. We all do this using different methods, quantifiable in different ways in physical reality, but at the end of the day, as humans we all experience the same emotions and chase the same desires, to feel and experience love.

If you want to feel love, all you need to do is give it, in everything you do.

The Final Chapter

I’ve just handed you by far the most potent message I could ever give you in this series on change. It’s simple, but infinitely complex. I hope you carry it forward and apply it to your life in the best way you know how and strive to make it who you are every day.

In the next, and final chapter in this series, I will conclude with the greatest revelation, in my opinion, of how you can tie all of this into creating positive change on a scale far beyond just you. Of course the change begins with just you, because if you and me, and others like us start making these changes, then global change occurs.

I’ll explain why you are so important to the process of global change in the next chapter. Stay tuned.

*Update*

The final chapter is now available: How You Can Change The World

Yaro
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