In my last article I mentioned there are two Tonys who I am currently receiving coaching from. Last week I wrote about Tony Horton and his P90X training program and how it helped me smash through some long-held body image limiting beliefs.
Today I’d like to discuss another Tony and what I am learning from him. Many people already guessed in comments to my last article which Tony I am talking about because he is no doubt the most well known coach on the planet. His name is Tony Robbins.
The Phenomenon That Is Tony Robbins
Whatever you think about Tony Robbins you have to give him credit for becoming ubiquitous with the field of personal development. No other coach on this planet has as well known a public perception in mainstream society as Tony, at least in Western countries. Given that he’s not a religious or spiritual figure I find this achievement alone spectacular. He’s clearly worked hard to consistently improve and touch as many lives as possible, using many different media formats.
I only began studying Tony’s work in the last few months. I’m pretty late to the party since Tony has been teaching for decades now.
Many of my friends have attended his multi-day seminars and even my friends who aren’t really what I would typically call self development types have listened to his tapes or CDs.
I’m not a fan of three or four day weekend long workshops, no matter who is teaching them or what the subject is. As a result I’ve stayed clear from Tony’s events despite constant recommendations from friends who say his style is the most captivating and entertaining of any live workshop they’ve attended.
I prefer studying in short bursts of one to two hours at a time. I’ve gotten a lot more from recorded live seminars chunking them into one to two hour study sessions than any day-long event. Hence I decided to purchase some of Tony’s home study resources as my first entry point to his work.
As I usually do, I went on to eBay to see what I could find, did some research on Tony’s site and found a recommended starting package that seemed reasonably current.
So far I’ve studied the first seven discs of Tony’s Personal Power audio series and the seven discs of Get The Edge. Now I’m going through the Power Talk sessions, which include a disc from Tony about a specific topic and an interview with a well known expert from different personal development fields.
What I’ve Learned About Tony Robbins
I’ve studied a lot of materials from the personal development and self help field. Some books, for example works of Eckhart Tolle and the Conversations With God series often contain a mix of relatively applicable ideas for every day life, and then dive into deep, complex and metaphysical subjects that can at times go to places that are incomprehensible by the human mind.
Some resources are more allegorical, using story telling and fables to deliver lessons that are applicable to modern day life, despite being taught using environments that most people will never encounter (for example I doubt I will ever find myself exploring the desert for “hidden treasure”, yet the Alchemist had a profound impact on my life).
Tony Robbins has two key skills that I believe are responsible for his success. These are certainly the aspects of his teachings I benefited the most from too. They are –
- Tony is very high energy and passionate about what he says. He knows his subject so well that I suspect he can easily riff off the top of his head about almost any personal development topic. Anyone who has spent some time immersed in an industry who is a well practiced or natural speaker will know what this is like. It certainly helps that the man himself is larger than life, but since I’m studying audio materials and not experiencing a live workshop, the fact that Tony can keep your attention, transfer ideas and get you very excited about improving your life, is significant.
- Tony’s teachings are incredibly relevant to the every day man or woman. In terms of practical application I haven’t come across any other teacher who is able to communicate so well to “normal” people leading “normal” lives. His ideas are instantly applied and you don’t need to be super-intelligent, philosophical or a “deep” person to understand what he says.
I listen to Tony while driving my car. I can honestly say that a daily dose of Tony is like a vitamin for the mind. You listen to him, feel inspired, are reminded what kind of person you want to be and reinvigorate your commitment to hold yourself accountable to this ideal.
It’s a simple idea, but like swapping out junk food for healthy vegetables can make your physical health so much better, as can swapping exercise for time spent on the couch watching TV, I absolutely believe that filling your mind with personal development materials instead of reading about the latest tragedy in the news or listening to negative people, will transform your life.
How can you not improve your life if you have this crazy giant of a man injecting you with positive change juice every day?
Lessons and Actions
Tony does a great job of mixing strategic discussion with practical ideas. I’m far and away a strategic person, which means I relish talking about all aspects of a concept to varying degrees of depth. The risk with this, especially for people who are not natural action takers, is that a subject may be talked about a whole lot, but not much real change happens.
I can tell Tony also likes to have a depth of knowledge about a subject, but more than anything wants his listeners to earn a result. Tangible outcomes are what matter, not just inspiring words, so Tony includes actionable steps in all his materials. You either participate with Tony while he takes you through the workshop or take the steps after you finish listening – well at least those who are looking to create real change do!
One of the most common feedback I receive about my teaching materials, especially my Blog Mastermind lessons, is the real applicability of what I lay out. I tell the story, explain the strategy and end with the steps. That’s a simple formula for good teaching materials. Tony uses this process over and over again throughout his audios.
What Did I Learn?
In my case, most of the actions I take as a result of listening to Tony is adjustment to my self talk and thus my emotional state. I’ve spent the last ten years learning that what I think impacts how I feel, which impacts how I experience life. All of this goes on inside, but of course your internal state is eventually reflected in your external environment because you make decisions based on how you are thinking and feeling.
Tony is not the first person to iterate that you are what you believe you are, and that is 100% in your control. It’s been taught over and over and over to me and now forms the core structure of my belief system. It’s amazing how powerful this is when you have it stated to you over and over again in different formats by different people. I’ve heard the message in movies, books, songs, from friends, teachers, family, seen countless examples and experienced a plethora of my own situations to reinforce this belief.
Tony, in a lot of ways is the final brush and polish, completing the picture that is now part of my personality. His practical implementation makes it incredibly easy to apply to my own life. I’ve been reprogramming myself for years, but it never hurts to hear sound advice more than once, or twice or ten times. In fact it’s necessary for that much repetition if you want to make it truly a part of who you are.
The real profound change that has occurred in me is the speed of adjustment to how I perceive things. I am so in tune to my emotional state that I can very easily acknowledge a feeling, discover it’s root cause and then course correct on the fly. I can spot erroneous rationalizations and replace them with beliefs that are based on the type of person I want to become almost instantaneously. In the past I would have been stuck in negative patterns, poor interpretations and ultimately self-defeating thought-feeling-action loops that led to more of what I didn’t want.
Taking The Abstract And Making It Practical
A while ago I discussed the concept brought to my attention and simplified so wonderfully in the Conversations With God books. The idea is that you ultimately only have two possible interpretations to all things, one of…
1. Love
Or
2. Fear
You can believe in scarcity or abundance. You can fear the loss of something or become excited by the changes you are going through. You can marvel at someone else’s success or berate yourself for your own lack of success.
The core root of all these viewpoints is one of fear or love. I believe all emotional responses and perceptions of the world we experience can be drilled down to one of these two “feeling” words. Of course a word in itself can never accurately describe a feeling, but this is about as close as we can get in the English language.
The next step, at least if you want to enjoy pleasant emotions, whenever facing a decision or dealing with something you need to interpret, the question to ask is…
“What would love do?”
I find asking myself this question is enlightening. It’s like an emotional pattern interrupt. If you are feeling any sense of anger or loss or depression, or the essence of these things – fear – asking this question immediately shines a light on the situation and gives you a way to see the circumstance in a positive and productive manner.
Although it might be seen as a limitation (it’s no doubt deliberate) the conscious mind operates on one track. No two thoughts can exist at the same time. They can change from one to the other instantly, but you can’t interpret (think about) something as happy and sad at exactly the same time.
Emotions on the other hand are a lot more fuzzy. It sometimes feels like we can acknowledge the fear and the love in our interpretation at the same time, but one is always more dominant than the other. Since I believe all people on this planet desire happiness, thus a happy emotional state, the key is to switch everything over to the happy channel.
This is great when it comes to thinking because if you replace the negative constructs (the fear based perceptions) with positive ones (the love based perceptions), you’ve tuned your frequency to alignment with what you want to become. I say become because there is lag between thought patterns impacting emotional states, impacting physical reality. Thoughts can change instantly, emotions take more time and physical reality, because of our perception of time based on the movement of objects around us, seems to take the longest to change.
The challenge with all of this is how fuzzy it can be. For people not used to dealing with emotions or operating at a level of awareness of their emotional state, conditioning and rationalization process, the question “what would love do” may seem like a bunch of mumbo-jumbo spiritual hippy crap.
Enter the Tony Robbins school of awareness creation.
Tony, once again leveraging his ability to operate on a frequency that the every-day person can understand, works with the idea of refining your interpretation to things based on your self image and what type of person you want to be.
(On a side note, I’m also listening to the audio version of the New Psycho-Cybernetics, which offers a concise and specific look at the power of the self image and how to use your internal imagining system – the images in your mind about your life – to pre-program yourself to achieve your goals.)
Tony makes the abstract concrete. It’s not just “what would love do?” – it’s how not to feel like a failure when your colleague receives a promotion instead of you, or how to stop feeling ugly because you can’t get a date, or how to change your belief that you are a fat person to you are a healthy person, and then consequently take the actions that are congruent with these new interpretations.
The concept is the same, you’re changing one interpretation of the stimulus in front of you for another, infusing yourself with an entirely new self image and then acting different as a result. However Tony uses the language and examples that most people on this planet, regardless of spirituality (if any), religion or personality type will understand. Plus he’s just so darn excited about it!
It’s not a one-size-fits all solution, but it’s about as close as it gets and since Tony has spent so many years studying this area, working with people and seeing what works and what doesn’t, he’s in a position to pass on some tried and tested ideas.
Insert Coaching Into Your Life
I have to laugh sometimes at how much I hated studying at school and at university, yet today I so enjoy listening to audio books, lectures and recorded workshops by people who often have no academic qualifications at all. I enjoy self improvement and coaching – as you can tell because I write about them a lot here on this blog – so much so that I choose to study these things just as much for fun as to help me achieve my goals.
You have the choice of how you use your travel time and your leisure time – in fact all the time in your life. You can listen to music or watch your favorite TV series or a movie, or maybe read a magazine or gossip with a friend on the phone, or watch the news. There’s nothing wrong with these activities, I myself do them all from time to time as well.
However, if currently you are not studying anything to make yourself a better person, or focused on a project that encourages you to create and add something to the world that impacts other people in a positive way, then I suspect you might be sedating yourself with too much content that lacks substance.
Distraction is a disruption of action. The most productive actions come when you are congruently aligned towards a goal on all levels – mentally, emotionally and physically. That is why coaching and study is so important. These things are your training. They help you elevate into a state of preparedness that makes performance and achievement feel like a forgone conclusion.
If you’re currently not working on your own personal development then I strongly suggest you consider swapping out some of your less than productive activities – even just one – for something that makes you a better person.
Ask anyone who has achieved what you want in life and they will tell you they had to change certain beliefs, adjust their perceptions and improve their self image in order to create the environment within themselves for what they wanted to happen. This didn’t happen overnight and they weren’t born like that – they worked on it and used resources to help them.
You’re the catalyst for what you from life, so if you’re not working on you, you’re not going to change.
Yaro
Coached
Im a self help junkie and am always working on myself, unless I am submerged in a project 🙂 I have heard many great things about Eckhart Tolle but have yet to read any of his stuff. Tony Robins is a classic and everyone should read/listen to his stuff.
Sure its a rehash of lots of other stuff, but he does a great job of consolidating the information and delivering it with passion.
Great post!
I’m a huge advocate of the idea of habit replacement. If all I do is try to say ‘no’ to a bad habit, my willpower will pretty much always fail. But if I replace a bad habit with a good one, I’m on my way toward success!
Brandon, I agree with you 100%!!
Yaro, I am yet to study Tony Robbins work too!
I liked the concept of love vs. fear you described. It’s actually very biblical:
1 John 4,
18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
19 We love because he first loved us.
Many years ago I came across Tony Robbins, I had moved from the city to a small town and had absolutely no idea how to get myself motivated enough or find the opportunity to get another business going. Along cam the audio set of Tony… the days of tapes no less. I had so much fun doing these tapes, because I didn’t just listen to them I performed them!! I was on the back verandah shouting ‘I can do it!” on cue – much to my neighbours entertainment.
The tasks were all done and the self belief tasks were accomplished, I was feeling pretty good.
While walking along a street in the next town a girl I had met once, seemingly jumped out of her new physio clinic and asked me if I would like a room to work from.
This was to become my own clinic for 10 years, providing my income, social life and enjoyment while I raised my family.
When you know it will work, it will.
Thanks Tony and thanks to you also Yaro.
I am glad that we share this coach, as I’ve been listening to Tony’s stuff for a year now. I’ve been gone trough a divorce and it’s definitely helped me to get the adequate mind-set.
I also definitely relate to the fact that in school I hated reading books, but now I started to like it.
Yaro, I want to recommend 2 things:
1. Look on the website TED for Tony’s presentation, he really hits the ball out of the park there
2. Look on youtube for speeches of Jim Rohn (Tony’s mentor). Jim died last year, but has en enormous collection…..his stuff is also amazing!
Remco
Hi Remco,
Thanks for that I have not listened to Jim Rohn, will take a look.
ciao
-Lisa
Hi Yaro,
I agree on most points but this is incorrect:
The idea is that you ultimately only have two possible interpretations to all things, one of…
1. Love
Or
2. Fear
This an expression of dualist either/or thinking.
If you reconsider this for a moment, you may see that both are relative.
eg You can be in love and fear the same person at the same time.
Humans can hold both emotions are the same time – everything is relative.
Ivan
Hey Ivan, agreed – you can hold both emotions at the same time but you can choose only one interpretation as a thought and work towards acting on the emotion that expresses the option you prefer.
Both options must exist for without one you wouldn’t know the other, but the choice is there on what you think, thus feel and then act.
One thing that I learned from Tony Robbins when I first became interested in personal development a few years ago was what Tony called “CANI”… Constant and Never-ending Improvement. It is the practice of always doing something everyday that moves you towards your goal. So even if your goal is to become something that is seemingly unattainable, by taking even the smallest strides towards it on a daily basis you will eventually get a cumulative effect and it will be a monstrous result.
I think that anybody who wants to become successful should listen to Tony and master all of his principles, as there is something in there for everybody, no matter how small or big their goals and ambitions.
Good article.
Yaro, thanks for an insightful and detailed post. I have also been coached by both Tonys, having abused myself for 3 months in my living with Mr. Horton, and many years ago doing a walk across the coals with Mr. Robbins in Dallas, Texas.
My biggest takeaway from this post was to use audio on a daily basis to keep your mind focused on the right things. In an increasing distracting world, it’s becoming easier to get sidetracked. But, the choice of what we feed our mind is always ours.
@Remco – thanks for the tip on Tony’s TED talk, I look forward to checking that out.
-Devin
Yaro you outline some easy concepts that take a lifetime to master. Where many of us fail is in the conversion process.
In school when we take a course and are taught by the same teacher we end up with different results when it comes to exams. Some students receive over 90%, and some less than 50% for their mark. They’ve basically failed.
You’ve seen the results for yourself with your Blog Mastermind course. Of the hundreds if not thousands of people that have taken your course, you can count on 2 hands the ones that have converted what you’ve taught. Blogging looks easy but is far from easy at least if you want to make a full time living from it.
For my life I’ve chosen another teacher to learn from and my pattern interrupt question is What would Jesus do?
According to the Bible in 1st John 4:8 “God is love” so in essence I’m asking the same question that you are asking. My understanding of the word love is most likely different than your understanding, though.
It also shows me that each person’s journey to the truth, the light and the way is different. Yaro are you still planning to launch a new personal development blog? If so, when will that be?
Hi Dennis,
I’m not a religious man, but asking what would Jesus do is no doubt just as good a question if I assume Jesus acted on the choice of love in every decision he made.
I don’t know if he did of course, but he seemed to make a lot of choices that make him a fantastic role model, that’s for sure!
As you said, we can interpret God/Jesus/Love as one and the same, if those labels work for you, but everyone has their own interpretation. Deep down we all know emotionally what our options are in every decision and perception we make, we don’t need the labels to know this, we just use them as tools to communicate ideas to other people.
And that personal development blog will launch next year, though I have a course to teach first 🙂
I’m looking forward to it and I wish you continued success on your journey!
Yaro,
You have outdone yourself with this post. I have learned the hard way this year that everything in your life is a result of emotion and decisions (which come from emotions).
I’ve spent the entire year readjusting my mindset and am now working with a life coach.
I am also now much better at spotting negative thought patterns and finding more positive thoughts. I’m also learning not to self-sabotage my efforts.
I must say that I’ve been learning this stuff for years now, but as you have said, maybe you DO have to hear it over and over again in order for it to stick.
Am I where I want to be in terms of emotional state? No, not yet, but I’m determined to working at it daily in order to become the person I want to be.
I am learning that in the end I can choose between “love” or “fear” and that if I choose “love” there will be a certain amount of fear that comes with certain decisions and I just have to “feel the fear and do it anyways”!
Thanks for this brilliant post!
Krizia
PS: I’ll be re-reading this a few times.
Yaro,
I really enjoyed reading this article. I have listened to Tony Robbins and read his material and I think he is awesome, even though I’m not a fan of NLP. He is just so charismatic. I too am a lifelong student of self development. I feel the better you understand who you are, the easier it is to mold your life the way you really want it to be. I’m learning new stuff about myself and the world around me all the time. Long may it continue.
Terry
You wrote an excellent blog about the affects your encounters with Tony Robbins had on you. Your blog is quite compelling. Your descriptions of the two key skills Tony Robbins has that explain his success are superb. You describe him as a teacher and a passionate natural speaker. He is also a great showman, who can capture and keep your attention.
Thank you for your advice to “Insert Coaching Into Your Life” However, may I point out that Tony Robbins is not providing true personal or life coaching? Life coaching focuses totally on you, where you become the center of attention to discover and unravel the mystery of you. You true life coach asks you questions about you, listens intently, and reflects the truth about you without judgment, outside teachings, or an agenda. Your life coach will REVEAL YOU to YOU, so you will be clear and confident about your passions, talents, beliefs and values, priorities and your dislikes. This true clarity gives you the power to become what you want to be.
Tony Robbins starts the process, you true life coach will assist you to complete your trip.
The biggest change I’ve made for myself, which you eluded to about half way through, was the speed of adjustment factor. I, too, focused on becoming aware of my emotional states and how they affected my thoughts and behaviors. I noticed it in others and how unattractive it can be at times.
Now, I can notice when my emotional state is producing a limiting belief or rationalization and tell myself the story I need to bring myself back to balance. Emotional reactions are the worst in my opinion, and using awareness before reaction has been the sharpest tool in my belt so far. I can recognize the feeling and know whether I am reactionary or ready to make a logical decisive action.
You’ve helped influence quite a bit of this, just as Tony Robbins and Eckhart Tolle have as well. Thanks for that!
Brandon
Good article. My problem is never being able to stick to the advice for long enough before finding the advice of someone else. Choose a plan and stick to it is the advice I guess I need…
Great Post Yaro. I know when I was first starting out I thought all of this “self help” stuff was crap. Then I tried it…..boy was I wrong, it works if you let it. Especially, from guys like Tony Robbins.
BTW, I laughed out loud when I read the line “How can you not improve your life if you have this crazy giant of a man injecting you with positive change juice every day?”
Great Post Yaro!
I completely agree with you and the best of it is that I got a lot of help from it. Thanks.
Hey Yaro! I’ve been following Tony Robbins for many years now and he is so much more than a motivator, he really has innovative ideas and is a real inspiration to anyone who wants to be successful. It’s great to see you talk about him on your blog and I also agree that filling your mind with personal development materials is a much healthier alternative then watching or reading the news today. Henry Willard Austin, said, ““Genius, that power which dazzles mortal eyes, Is oft but perseverance in disguise.” My success has definitely come through perseverance.
Hi Yaro…so glad you found Tony… I also play him in the car and my children love him especially my 8 year old daughter.
Something as simple as changing my mindset has had a massive effect on our lives over the last 5 years since we started with Tony and then onto completing the Landmark Forum curriculum (incredible).
Only a few weeks ago I asked myself (after talking with my coach) “what would love do” when on my way to a meeting re my daughter being bullied by her teacher… I went into the meeting in a totally different space… and made a massive difference not only for my daughter, the teacher but also the other children in her care. It is something that just becomes part of who you are, a paradigm shift that can’t turn back. It is really moment to moment and you decide who you are going to be in that moment…
PS I get that “excitement and passion” in interactions with you, bet you’re loving Tony!!
ciao
– Lisa
Thanks for posting this very good topic. I sometimes down to earth with no passion to do things. But you have put confidence back to myself. Thanks for that…
Your post was a nice surprise. I have been following Tony for the past few years. I actually get the most out of his videos where he is working through his process on various people. They are a lot of them online. I have never seen anyone be able to create change in someone that is lasting and/or completely transforms their lives the way he does. He is really re patterning your thoughts and he talks about how he does this in his books and videos.
I enjoy Eckhart Tolle as well. Completely different experience to listen to him versus Tony, but his information is life altering as well. In particular, A New Earth.
Highly recommend Wayne Dwyer and Abraham & Esther Hicks if you haven’t read any of their books.
Yaro,
This has been a fantastic post filled with lots of practical content on how it has impacted your life and how you are able to decipher the elements stated in your mind to have a clear consideration on the facts or the situation instead of allowing your reactions or emotions to play a role in your undertaking. It also provides concrete methods on how you may control your thoughts so that it may help with your situation instead of sabotaging your life.
I’ve personally been reading a lot of self-help books and found out that the origin of these actually comes from lots of famous philosophers many many years ago. My two favourite books are Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill and The Prosperity Bible (which has many articles from authors dated back in the 1800’s & early 1900’s).
There’s also been quite a few seminars I’ve attended recently and found that the Landmark Forum really gives you a lot more clarity on how to approach life in a much better way to obtain fulfillment and brings out methods to see why these beliefs exist and how to get rid of them for good. Most of our underlying beliefs have been created since we were a child and as we get older we don’t even realize they exist. Everyone who attended from my group experienced a major breakthrough in their lives.
Really appreciate your sharing and insights on personal development, it sure provides a different angle and allows the readers to understand from a practical perspective how this may be applied. I totally agree that listening to audio tapes or reading on a daily basis will provide us with reminders and a better foundation to a much more productive and fulfilling life. It’s easy to forget if it there isn’t a continuous reminder until there’s success in ingraining this into your subconscious where it may work on autopilot.
I would like to acknowledge that you have a great way of explaining your experiences and making it really easy and understandable for the readers.
I also completed the Landmark Curriculum and have had breakthroughs in areas I didn’t even see going in… personal, business, health, I can highly recommend it!
ciao
-Lisa
Recently I read, “the only two wholesome responses to any situation are compassion and joy for another person.”
I think about that a lot now, and keep trying.
Aloha Yaro, I am amazed with your post, the list from Tony Robbins to the analogy of your schooling. I personally can say I never thought I would be reading and learning so much online as I do now. I despised reading and now I do it for a living and enjoy it, because there are so many others like me, discovering themselves and finding out who they are and their gifts within them to share with others. Very inspiration and with deep expressions. Mahalo for sharing! Lani 🙂
Thanks for the post. I find the car a very enjoyable time to listen to self improvement tapes myself as well -and so much more productive than the latest on politician’s “who did what” reports and the likes.
Yaro, What a great post. I too, just recently listened to Tony. Not sure why it took so long as I am a personal development lover. I walk with him in my ear every morning going through breathing exercises, gratitude, vision and then incantations. Just love his energy and his level of really caring about what he is doing.
Hey Yaro, great post.
I especially like the part about substituting out just one of your more “unproductive” aspects of your day with some personal development. It all starts with one…. one book, one tape, one CD, one action… done again and again over a period of time… to make it a habit.
Then on to the next. Rinse and repeat.
Now I’m off to buy some Tony Robbins stuff for myself for Christmas! 🙂
Awesome post! Yes, the Alchemist is a great book – I would highly recommend “Creative Mind and Success’ which was written in the early 1900’s
Yaro, I like the fact you finally got to listen to your friends about Tony 🙂
He’s a mentor I follow, along with Jay Abraham and Robin Sharma.
Google the guys, you might learn from them too.
I’m definitely working on improving myself everyday. I loved school, but I also love to learn something new everyday, which is why I signed up for various courses and try to get some reading done all the time. You never stop learning, no matter how old you get.
I am a self made person and love tho have challenges in my life. I always think that there is nothing that you can not achieve. The main moto of my life is “Never Give Up”. This is the thing that can make you a strong as well as a confident person.
I am also a big Tony Robbins fan been reading his books for years. I have never met Tony in person but I saw his son Jairek speak last year at an event in Dublin.
He had the same energy as Tony just a slighty more relaxed tone to his voice.I will be going to his event in Italy later this year will be my first time at a Tony Robbins event looking forward to it.. 🙂