It was the year 2003…
Like most days, I started my morning lying in bed on my back, feeling a combination of excitement and stress as I stared at the ceiling, thinking about all the things I’d like to change about my life.
I was 23 years old, graduated from university, renting a small townhouse in Brisbane Australia with two girls – one a lawyer, the other an engineer — who were rarely home.
I didn’t have a job. I was an online entrepreneur.
At least that is what I attempted to be every day, plugging away to make money from various online projects.
My computer, conveniently positioned right next to my bed, was the starting point of my ‘work’ day.
I rolled out from under the covers, clicked the switch to turn on my monitor and immediately checked my emails.
From that point forward my emotions would turn from motivated to get things done, to progressively more and more tired, then eventually overwhelmed and stressed.
I spent almost my entire day sitting alone in my bedroom in front of a computer.
I went for walks, rode my bike to the grocery store to pickup food, or occasionally met up with friends for a catchup tea, but for the most part, I lived my life online.
From Sugar Rush To Lost Child
As I scanned through my emails that morning, I received some good news – someone had purchased one of the packages from my online editing business.
Boom! – Instant high.
It felt like a sugar rush to make money.
I didn’t wake up to a sale like this every morning, but when I did I immediately had a burst of energy and felt that everything would be okay.
My business would succeed, I’d be rich and all those doubts I feel would be gone for good!
By mid-afternoon the sugar rush was gone, I was tired and my mind would wander.
I’d begin clicking links in emails and on websites, reading about other people making money online…
- There was the guy using pay per click marketing to sell affiliate products making hundreds of thousands every single day.
- Then there was the mother of three with the huge cooking website, getting millions of visitors every month, bringing in tens of thousands of dollars every week from ad revenue and sponsorships.
- Then there was the email marketer talking about how he just sent one email and made $33,000 back in sales of his digital course.
Plus there were all the other ‘opportunities’ that bombarded my mind every day.
From social media, to video, to podcasting, speaking from the stage, selling physical products on eBay or Amazon, running product launches, teleconferences and webinars.
It was overwhelming, but also addictive.
Other people’s success made me excited, curious and depressed all at the same time.
I was jealous of their results.
– I wanted to make $33,000 from sending one email.
– I wanted millions of people visiting my website every day.
– I wanted to buy traffic from pay per click ads to sell affiliate products and make a million dollars a year, or make $40,000 from just one webinar, or bring in thousands a day from selling some kind of toaster on amazon.com.
It all seemed so amazing, so exciting, yet so far away.
The truth was that my business was growing at a snails pace.
I was surviving by keeping a casual job working at a university library to supplement my income.
At night as a result of being exposed to all these success stories and being lured by money, I’d start side projects trying to copy what these people were doing.
Most of the projects lasted a day, maybe a week at most.
They were all distractions, chasing money just for the sake of money.
(Years later this would be known as ‘shiny object syndrome’, something new entrepreneurs today still suffer from.)
The end result of all this floundering about was a sense of confusion, frustration and failure.
When Friday rolled around I felt the worst.
This is when the depression and despair set in…
I was alone, with no real social life, no friends I could talk to who understood what I was going through, no mentors, guides, or people who had experience with online business.
I was isolated, and it was a bigger problem then I realized.
The Truth I Couldn’t See
I’m an introvert.
I love spending time alone. I feel 100% me when by myself, especially when doing an activity I love.
Unfortunately this sense of comfort with being alone blindsided me.
I didn’t understand what was wrong because I didn’t think anything was wrong.
I kept working for so many years entirely in isolation because I thought if I just kept at it for long enough something would work.
I’m smart. I’m good at working alone. It’s not a bad thing…
…Is what I told myself.
There’s some truth in that belief, but it also cost me SEVEN years.
I say it cost me that much time because I wasted all those years working entirely alone, doing everything myself, and repeating the patterns that kept me unsuccessful, frustrated and during those horrible Fridays — depressed.
I can tell you this in confidence today because I’ve seen people in recent years rocket to success much more quickly than I ever did.
These people were just as I was back then, keen to create an online business, but starting with absolutely nothing.
They then proceeded to build amazing businesses that surpass $100,000 a year in their first or second year (a level that took me seven years to reach!), then push on towards million dollar businesses within three to four years.
The key thing they did right (and I did not in my early days) was…
…they didn’t do it alone.
When they started they sought out people who had succeeded in business and done what they wanted to do, then found a way to get some time with them to ask for advice.
They joined online communities, became part of mastermind groups, hired coaches and mentors, paid for courses and actively sought out the right people for advice, for friendships and for leadership.
I did none of this.
These people surrounded themselves with a community of peers — who are on the same journey as they are — so they could call on help when times were tough, when problems seemed unsolvable.
This community and mentorship helped them when they needed it most.
They didn’t get trapped in circles of despair like I did.
They don’t start and stop projects hundreds of times, or get stuck paralyzed for very long.
They learned how to stay focused and pick the right things to focus on, because other people taught them how to.
I didn’t have this advantage. I was foolish enough to believe I could do it all on my own.
As a result, I spent much of my first seven years in isolation doing the wrong things, a mistake I don’t want you to make.
Your Invitation To My Private Coaching Community
I just opened up doors to the Laptop Lifestyle Academy, a new membership site and community I created to make sure no entrepreneur who desires freedom has to build their business alone.
I don’t want you to go through what I went through for as long as I did during my early days online.
If this story I just shared with you resonates, head to the Laptop Lifestyle Academy to learn all about the program.
I’d love to work with you over the next 12 months or more to help you grow your online business.
I’ll see you inside the Academy.
Yaro Starak
Not Alone
Hey Yaro,
I think you and I have traveled the same road in some respects. After an early success selling on eBay, I figured this “internet thing” couldn’t be THAT hard. I tried one thing after another and finally found some level (low level) of success in affiliate marketing. I continued on through the ups and downs that eventually caused me physical harm.
I too believed I could do it alone. While not a strict introvert, I’ve always been perfectly happy by myself. I enjoy the company of family and friends but wasn’t less than whole alone. Like you, I wasted a lot of time like this and don’t want anybody to have to repeat that if they don’t have to.
Then, in mid 2015, I finally decided to invest in myself with a virtual mentor I had followed for years, YOU! Since that time, the amount of personal growth I’ve felt has been amazing! People like you tend to attract the best people who then become your community. Your community has made the difference in my life and business!
In 2016, I purchased your Blog Mastermind program which I am currently just beginning the study of.
Am I “there” yet? No. Do I now believe if I follow your Blog Mastermind course and take action that I will get “there”? Absolutely!
Cheers,
Jeff
Hello Yaro,
I’m writing this comment from the other side of the world, Bolivia (Sorry for my english, I’m still in the learning process).
I must confess that I’m a complete beginner. I started following you a little time ago. But, the way you write your posts are very ilustrative and readable for the novice.
Until now, I was considering to start alone. But according to your personal experience this is not a good idea. So I’ll take the other way to achieve my goals in order to reach success.
Have a nice day. Thanx again.
Of a truth, I agree with Paul Visa said above, your contents are very educative to a newbie in blogging like myself. Thank you, Yaro and keep up the good work.
from cameroon central africathe story is simply mine there . because i have lost at 7 years of my life in isolation . and since one year i am struggling with online marketing with absolutly no probing results please YARO can my life change as from now that i am joining your business online . having no website no skill and so forth …
Hi Yaro; Great advice. I learned from adrienne smith about the value of building relationships online. We can’t do it all ourselves, so online communities whether formal or just a group of people who support each other are very important. I have recently started offering a new service where I help people get booked on podcasts radio shows and other onine media. I did this aftr friends helped me realize that while people didn’t want my coaching on life goals they were and are interested in my teaching them how to get more exposure. And many decided to ask me to do the work for them after finding out what all goes into doing this. Sometimes it takes another set of eyes or ears to recognize the truth. Thanks for this post, Max
Very good. The image up there is in Canada?
Yes, that’s a road stop on the way to Whistler in British Columbia.
As a Mom of two boys I feel I am never alone!
I do here what you are saying and have joined several communities to collaborate and it helps and distracts.
Finding a rythem of writing seems to take time. Plus the word press tech stuff is exasperating !
Thanks for writing !
Great post Yaro. This really resonated with me – thank you for sharing.
I’ve been trapped in a cycle of sugar highs and despair for the past few years.
Since quitting my FT job in the US and moving to southeast asia, I’ve met a community of entrepreneurs and digital nomads which has improved my exposure to “things that actually work” but I’ve still found it difficult to master the balance between support, accountability, and time spent executing.
It looks as if everybody must travel down this road of hard knocks before finding their salvation. Your story could have been mine, with absolutely nothing to change, except the end. I’m yet to make it, despite the hard work. So, I’ve joined your 2 groups in order to benefit from the stories and motivations of others. Surely I’m signing up for your courses one of these days.